Dear Stephen,
Your shipment is now on its way to you via FedEx Ground. While Kelli was carefully hand-packing your shipment, we all sang a song of farewell and blew confetti about the warehouse. Then we packed your speakers on the truck, snapped to a smart salute and sent them on their way.
If any confetti remains on your box, please dispose of it carefully. One can never fully trust confetti.
Your new Aperion Audio speakers have seen much in their travels. Now they're ready to take you on cinematic and audio adventures of your own. Treat them well, love them, and they will last a lifetime.
If you have any questions, need to uncork some nervous excitement, or need help setting up your system, you're always welcome to give us a call or email us.
Thanks, and happy listening.
This, I've been informed, is standard fare. While some might find this sort of service a bit too syrupy, I am fricking all about it. I haven't been this excited about receiving an audio component since
the Moscode 401HR. You may recall that Moscode offers
a very personal touch, as well. Man,
I like that. In fact, I love it. I like knowing that the speakers are on the way. I like knowing that someone named Kelli packed them for me, carefully. Is it a coincidence that Aperion's distribution manager is named Kelli (just like my sweetheart)? Most definitely, yes, but I like that, too. I take it as a good sign. I also like all the silly talk of song and celebration. Did they
really salute the truck as the speakers sped away? Eh, maybe not. But so what? I like the thought of it. It makes me smile. It makes me wish I was actually buying these speakers. It makes me feel as though these speakers have heart, have soul.
It's a phenomenon that's been documented before: Audiophiles become emotionally attached to their audio gear. When no one's around, we may talk to our amplifiers, we may congratulate our loudspeakers on a particularly fine performance, we may gaze happily into the blue-lit front panels of our CD players. It's foolish and embarrassing, but, hey, it's fun.
We form relationships with our toys. Usually, it takes some time. We have to get to know one another first, have a few drinks, listen to some songs.
Shit, with these Aperion speakers, I'm already feeling connected. That's good business. Alright, so we're talking marketing and customer service here. Aperion achieves this to a degree I've only experienced before with one other internet-based innovator:
Zipcar. These days, I look forward to exhausting trips to Whole Foods just so Kelli and I can be reunited with our old buddy, Mini Murton. I'm surprised Aperion isn't giving their speakers snazzy names like Center Channel Chanel or Booker T Bookshelf.
But how do they sound? I'll promise to keep my silly feelings in check while I listen. After all, these are only speakers. And I suspect that swapping back and forth between the PSB Alpha B1,
successor to one of the best-selling audiophile speakers ever, and the Intimus 532, Aperion's most popular speaker, will offer some interesting results. I'll let you know if I find any confetti.
