Interestingly enough, this essay is <I>by</I> a woman. Sheesh, obviously only a guy would be qualified to handle this question. No, wait a minute, I 'm a guy and even <I>I</I> know better than to try to answer that one.

It's Johnny's birthday<BR>It's Johnny's birthday<BR>And we would like to wish him all the very best<BR>It's Johnny's birthday<BR>It's Johnny's birthday<BR>And it's so nice to have you back to be our guest.<BR><I>George Harrison: <B>All Things Must Pass</B></I>

Belt buckle? Jimminy Christmas, Sweet Couture is selling cassette tape belt buckles. It's $10 for a "We pick," $15 for your favorite brand. They don't offer <I>my</I> fave, the TDK-MAXG, however&mdash;which is a shame, because $15 wouldn't be an unreasonable price for one of those bad boys.

Trying to convince your friends you're a time traveler? Folllow these, ahem, timely tips.

Oh boy! This was one of my most eagerly anticipated auditions. At my first demonstration of an OLS loudspeaker system several years ago, I was bowled over not only by the demo, but also by the idea that OLS's Kharma line was topped by the $1,000,000 Grand Enigma system!

Oh boy! This was one of my most eagerly anticipated auditions. At my first demonstration of an OLS loudspeaker system several years ago, I was bowled over not only by the demo, but also by the idea that OLS's Kharma line was topped by the $1,000,000 Grand Enigma system!