Two microphones. Two ears listening. With my teponatzli, an Aztec slit drum, and a fresh pair of Vic Firth 7A drum sticks, I marched back and forth between two $35 Audio Dynamica Low-Z Dynamic microphones: "Stage left near!" Smack! Against the teponatzli. It produced a low tone. "Stage left far!" Whack! I gave the log another beating, this time on the higher pitch. "Center stage!" Barararata! I let off a diced-up buzz roll. I slapped on some cans to listen to the recording. It was all screwed up.
I had my microphones switched around, with my left mic panned all the way to the…