No Sweeping Exits or Offstage Lines

I was thinking about it this morning, and yes: a blog is a terribly pretentious thing.

The ride out to Bay Ridge seemed to take forever. Outside, it was still raining. At least, underground, I was dry. In between reading Corey Greenberg’s essay on epiphanies and Wes Phillips’ e-newsletter on ripping LPs, I sent you a text message which you would not receive, writing simply to thank you for making me feel better—as you always do—with the way you listen and the way you think, the way you smile and the way you nod.

I’ll say that Mr. Conduso’s comment really hurt my feelings. I’m not embarrassed. At first, I felt silly and sensitive and even thin-skinned, but now, it doesn’t bother me at all. In fact, I feel good. While I do consider myself strong, I never want to be callous. I can understand him being bored by the blog, sure—and my advice to Mr. Conduso would be to immediately rid himself of all things in life which bore him, my blog included—but what did I do to make him so mad? Everyday, I’m amazed by how kind people can be, but I’m also amazed by how cruel people can be. I guess things balance out, and balance is good. Overall. More or less. Good enough, I suppose.

But not nearly as good as dinner last night. Finally climbing out of the subway tunnel, and again into the rain, I was immediately overcome by the feeling that this would be a very important experience. All around me: motion and light, a string of blue-glowing beads connecting one place to another, a pizzeria, a Dunkin Donuts. It’s strange how familiar Brooklyn always seems to me. I know my way around by feeling, even at night. I made it to Joan and Wes’ place right on time and enjoyed a tour, followed by a Brooklyn Lager, followed by a delicious meal.

Wes showed me around the kitchen: "And did I tell you about the liquor cabinet? Some fine stuff in there. It’s yours to explore and experiment with."

This is an audiophile tweak, I assume. I’m looking forward to it. As if I didn’t already feel spoiled.

"The hi-fi will be the Viola Labs preamp and power amp, along with the Ayre Universal player and the Penaudio loudspeakers," Wes shows me. "Ought to be fun," he says.
I smile and nod.

I was thinking about it this afternoon, and yes: a blog is a terribly pretentious thing.

And today: We’re standing in the deli across the street where she gets her afternoon cookie—a pleasure that I will miss—and the sky is still coming down. Yes, still. I splash the apples and tomatoes with rain water from the sunshine-yellow umbrella because I hope it will make you smile. I love your smile even more than the song coming from the deli’s little boombox, and I love this song so much. I have to search to find the origin of the music, and finally see that the boombox is hidden up near the ceiling, and it sounds just fine to me right now. I want to grab a couple of beers from the fridge and go sit up there on that piece of plywood with you and with you and just stay there, singing and singing and singing. Singing and singing and singing. Singing Wild Horses.

Al Marcy's picture

My comment two blogs south was meant to be one blog south. Sigh.

nina's picture

nix, you write beautifully. your blog is one of the highlights of my fact, last night at around midnight, i was about to go to sleep, when i suddenly realized something was missing. sure enough, i hadn't read your daily post. so thank you. thank you for giving me yet another reason to stay up late and surf your site and download tunes. one final comment: if, in fact," there are any people ""out there"" who feel your blog--blogs in general--are pretentious", i can only imagine that they are just jealous of the ease in which you spin seemingly regular old words into musical poetry.

tris mccall's picture

i think it's *great* to have haters who are obviously on the wrong side of history.

David Gray's picture

I love your blog and hope you keep up the effort for a long time to come.

eden's picture

Nina is right on the money!I defintely echo her sentiment :-)

David andrews's picture

Atkinson, when are you going to figure it out? Readers don't give a rat's patootie for reading blogs (or article digressions, Sam Tellig...) on what you guys had for dinner, who you know in Europe, what art galleries you vist, etc. -- or anything else that isn't directly related to the title of your magazine. Why do you keep tjis guy anyway? Because his already retro glasses make him seem smart?

Stephen Mejias's picture

Hey Al.
No worries, I got your drift. I think I would like to do a little A/B/C-ing... I wasn't able to bring the Magnavox on the first trip. We'll see.Thanks for the suggestion.

Stephen Mejias's picture

Nina and Eden: my dear, sweet, beautiful friends, I love youse. Thanks for always being so supportive and awesome. And thank you for all the music you share with me, and allow me to share with you. It's a great help, an inspiration, and always fun.

Stephen Mejias's picture

Tris: When I felt so upset by Mr. Conduso's comment, I thought of you telling me how you love it when people are angered or moved by your writing. It helped me get over it. You're awesome, and always an inspiration. See you at the show tomorrow.

Stephen Mejias's picture

Hello David Gray.
Thank you so much for reading and for taking the time to comment. It means a lot to me. I hope that I'll continue to keep the blog going for a long time, too. And, for as long as I do, I hope I continue to offer something that interests you.
Thanks again.

Stephen Mejias's picture

Hi David Andrews.
Even though you say you're not interested, it seems to me that at least a few readers are. And that makes me happy. I'll try to keep doing whatever it is I've been doing that has gained their interest and respect, and, at the same time, I hope the blog will gain the interest and respect of others. I can't imagine that would be be a bad thing; seems to me that it'll be really nice.I am nowhere near as awesome a writer as Sam Tellig, but I'm honored that you'd think of including me in the same thought. He's another guy whose work inspires and motivates me.Thanks for reading and thanks for the comment.