Stephen Mejias

Popcorn Seasoning

Stephen Mejias  |  Sep 26, 2006

Speaking of keeping it real:
"I just hate starting the day like this," JA sighed.

He'd been stuck in the Madison Avenue traffic. Buses, taxis, and eighteen-wheelers coughed and moaned, sending their fumes into a bright, blue sky. I watched and waited as red turned to green turned to red. On my hand truck, I balanced the tall Silverline speakers, the squat PSBs, and the weighty Zanden amplifier. The air was cool. Our office building is shaded not by green trees, but by gray scaffolding. Construction workers filed in and out, rolling large spools of black cable into the building's narrow freight entrance, like ants (of course!) transporting food into a dark hole. JA would arrive with the PrimaLuna ProLogues, and we would make a trade: my boxes into his trunk and his boxes into our office. Finally, we'd meet again upstairs.

"I just hate starting the day like this," JA sighed.
"It gets better from here," I returned his sigh with one of my own.

I walked into my office and fell into my seat, already exhausted, at only 10 past 10. I hadn't even had my coffee yet. Porter, our mailroom attendant, came in with a package.

The lightweight box measured about 12 x 8 x 2 and was addressed to me:

Mr. Stephen Mejias
Calendar & Events Editor
STERO PHILE

I wondered what it could be. Some sort of iPod accessory? A few new CDs? A very small amplifier? I hadn't requested anything.

I was excited. I opened the box.

COMMENTS
Buddha's picture
Submitted by Buddha (not verified) on September 26, 2006 - 4:02pm

Whatever you do, don't use those on or for food!

Kernel Season is a famous audiophile tweak manufacturer in Eastern Europe. Those are probably high priced system tweaks.

Nacho Cheese sprinkled on your disc player while listening to salsa music makes it more lively and spicy.

Butter helps smooth out harsh treble and midrange.

White Cheddar improves polka music. (Keep in mind he is Eatsern European.) It probably enhances Klezmer music, too.

The popcorn"" grains go under your equipment feet and between your speakers and their stands. They work on top of speakers and electronics", too.

The butter on them helps hold them in place. They also help warn of system over-heating.

All in all," Kernel Season's tweaks make your system sound (and smell) more appetizing. They add ""pop"" to your dynamics", too.

Hope you read this in time. That kit probably costs 3K to replace.

Dang, all this Hi Fi audio talk made me hungry...

NFS Audio's picture
Submitted by NFS Audio (not verified) on September 26, 2006 - 4:05pm

I hope you have enough popcorn for all of us!

Ward's picture
Submitted by Ward (not verified) on September 27, 2006 - 8:41am

When can we expect a review?

Ward's picture
Submitted by Ward (not verified) on September 27, 2006 - 11:33pm

Just don't forget the associated equipment. Microwave/pop corn popper, power cord, popcorn, serving bokwl, handling gloves (if any), salt (sea salt, table salt, kosher salt), movie, etc.

Buddha's picture
Submitted by Buddha (not verified) on September 28, 2006 - 11:35am

Wow, sounds like there may be quality control issues.

I've had uneven experiences with some of the Kernel Lingus equipment, as well.

However, juts like with LP playback, I've seen the Kernel Lingus quality improve after a simple, yet thorough, washing procedure.

I feel a song coming on...

Found a flaw with the flip top,

Quality's not tip top;

Not fit for a meal, but I took some back home.

'Cause there's booze in the blender,

And soon it will engender

That Hi Fi sensation that helps me hang on.

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