Stephen Mejias

The e-mail popped in at around 4pm last Friday afternoon.

"Hi JA," Jon Iverson wrote. "As I was looking at the Cabasse review, it occurred to me that we could create an "Audacious Audio" category for products like this…."

"You must be psychic, Jon," returned JA, "as I was thinking the same thing while looking at the Cabasse review. Let's do it!"

"So, do we go with Audacious Audio?" Jon asked.

"I like it," I responded. "Plus, I can't think of anything more alliterative."

A flurry of enthusiastic e-mails zipped back and forth between me at 261 Madison Avenue, John Atkinson in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, and Jon Iverson in his dream house out in the jungles of California. We had about a dozen or so reviews added to the new archive when we realized something funny:

They had all been written by Michael Fremer.

Coincidence?

Um, probably not. In any case, the fellas spent some more time with it over the weekend and came up with a solid selection of entries. Half of them are by Mikey. My favorite, however, is probably this gem by Corey Greenberg on 1992's version of a music server, the Proceed CD Library.

Now here's where the fun begins. Let's pretend I'm Richie Rich, and I'm sprawled naked on my giant bearskin rug with Wilson-Phillips. I'm grooving to The Black Saint And The Sinner Lady, but the girls aren't crazy about Mingus.

"I want to hear our CD!" chirps Chynna.

I roll Carny off the Communicator, aim it at the IR receiver, and press "On." The backlit display blinks on, asking me to choose a category from the ones shown on the screen. I press the blue thumb-button next to "HURL," then the "Send" button. The Communicator scrolls past several selections till I hit "WILSON-PHILLIPS," then I press "Play" and "Send." The CD Library churns for a moment as the carousel turns 'round searching for the W-P disc, then goes silent. A few seconds later, pure power pap for pubeless pawns pours out of the Proceed, and I didn't even have to sit up straight! Is that the coolest or WHAT?!

Mmm…. Chynna.