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Q: Why did the audiophile cross the road? A: Because the imaging was better on the other side.

Fine, have an audio jokes section. Some are quite funny. The biggest audio joke is that most of the equipment out there sounds so bad . . . like any reflex or box speaker. The wrong bass sounds they make, either in terms of no dynamics (box) or one (wrong) note whoompa-whoompa, silly, resonant bass (reflex) are culturally ingrained on our ears because they are popular and that's all people hear (no live music), so they actually think they sound correct! Let's get back to the serious questions please.

Q: Why do audiophiles use green magic markers on CDs? A: Because they used up their black ones highlighting textbooks in graduate school!

We're a sorry bunch of loser (with a lot of money).

Q. What's the difference between an audiophile and a musician? A. The musician gets PAID for caring more about his gear than his music.

Litebulb joke: Only one, but it takes about three weeks to fully appreciate the new bulb. First , the power cable has to be replaced, then the socket needs rubber feet, the bulb needs a damper, and of course it gives off green light after the magic-marker treatment. Finally, it takes about three weeks for the bulb to properly burn-in. What would be useful is to obtain a copy of the Stereophile Lightbulb burn-in socket, which automatically turns the bulb on/off in a special pattern to enhance the electrons and the glowing stage. One more note: Two bulbs placed about 7-9 feet apart about 1/3 of the way into the room create a more realistic lighting experience.

This is new!! Keep it up!!

Except the purple lips and odd-shaped heads. Ah, the worlds queer, except thee and me, and even thee's a little queer.

A: None, the concept of screwing the valve into the socket doesn't make any sense. :-)

Don't try so hard you guys, it's not worth your valuable space or effort!!!

Here is one I thought I saw in Stereo Review in the late '60s; think it was a Rodrigus cartoon. Audiophile has a large seashell in his living room, friend picks it up and puts it against his ear to hear "ocean sounds" but can't hear anything; he turns shell over and sees double-D logo and the words "Dolby System." Ha, ha, ha!

Is there nothing more pertinent to discuss?

Hmmm . . . a real audiophile would make sure that the lightbulb was made in by Svetlana or at least be an NOS GE. None of that stuff made in China. And, of course, a real audiophile would make sure that the lightbulb was turned on for at least two hours before it could be used for critical reading. Lastly, none of them solid state 12VDC halogens or fluorescents. Only good old incandescent will do. AND . . . of course, the spectral balance of that incandescent will be very important! OHOHOH, the SE folks will want a 12VDC lightbulb. Something about the glow. The OTL troops, of course, will insist on 100 1W lightbulbs all wired in parallel. And . . . have we discussed the light socket yet?

Be careful, Audio buddies: Stereophile is selling those surveys to manufacturers' for data-mining!

jokes are funny but this is not a joke web site. but that dose not mean you can't print them once in a while.

How many audiophiles does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Audiophiles don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in their $100,000 listening rooms.

Make sure that there is no Jitter in the connection.

Audiophiles who can't laugh at their affliction probably do not have enough disposable income.

But, Lisa Astor puts it all in perspective!

old, stale... Then again this IS Stereophile so....

IF YOU CAN'T LAUGH AT YOURSELF, GET A LIFE. LOVE THE HUMOR!

Q: What happens when you give an audiophile Viagra? A: There's more bloom in his midrange.

Excuse me, but lightbulb jokes are my bag, baby . . . Q: How many audiophiles does it take to change a light bulb? A: "Sssh, wait, wait---doesn't it sound better now?"

True story . . . nameless audio dealer's young son in answer to math teacher: "What does > mean, Peter?" "Play, ma'am." Dad was very proud.

Lightbulb joke: One, but it will take him five hours and three trips to the supply store to tweak the filament for optimum color balance.

Lightbulb joke: Two: one to measure and one to put tape on the floor to mark the "sweet spot" to put the ladder. And then no one is allowed to touch it.

Given a choice there will always be a difference of a opinions.

Paul Klipsch is walking down a city street when he sees Dr. Amar Bose walking toward him. He cups his hands to his mouth in a horn shape and yells "Hi, Dr. Bose, how are you?" Dr. Bose sees him and acknowledges him by turning around, facing the opposite way, and yelling back, "I'm fine, Paul. How are you?"

Suggestion: Take all of your equipment reviews and put them in a database that could only be accessed by subscribers.

Audiophiles are tragic---the Sisyphus of the modern age.