You are here

Log in or register to post comments
D3sign3r
D3sign3r's picture
Offline
Last seen: 2 years 9 months ago
Joined: Oct 8 2011 - 1:51am
What Women Want...is

 

...well, high end Hi-fi, of course...

According to folklore we men think of sex every 15 seconds .....or was it minutes....I'm not sure ...and apparently women think about it only after being heavily sedated or drugged.

A well known British newspaper, The Daily Telegraph, did some research on this claiming that their study showed men think about sex 5000 times a year or 13 times a day, and for women this was 1800 times a year or 5 times a day.  One should never underestimate the power of the male mind - this is proof, if any where needed, that we process more information.

No doubt their study was conducted only on us very proud, reserved British people, because I'm sure if you were Italian or your name happen to be Berlusconi, you may have to use "Pico-seconds" as the time constant.

There was a film called "What women want" with Mel Gibson hearing brainwave patterns from females. The upshot of this was that he had the ability to read the thoughts of any female person close by.

 Imagine this idea the other way round... in that women can clearly hear OUR thoughts...all sorts of guy type musings would get an uncensored airing.

  • "I wish  could bury my face into her jugs and drown".
  • Girl on bike "...boy that saddle's in heaven, wish it was my face"
  • "I wonder what colour her bush is?...I'd like to trim it with my teeth"
  • "I'd like to play new and interesting games with her...like... find the sausage".

    etc. etc...

Of course if this were the case, we blokes will get a devastating  bitch slapping 13 times a day? Or according to the folklore; every 15 seconds or minutes or whatever...

BUT... what if we could telepathically pick up each others thoughts simultaneously; Imagine the arguments that may be induced in a Hi-Fi store

 

Guy = "Yeah , that'll do me, big woofers, it'll sound great"

Girl = "...that was designed in and for Frankenstein's castle"

Guy = "what a pathetic piece of junk"

Girl = "...it'll fit nicely on the bookcase"
 

Guy = "...specs says 0.0003% THD at 1000Watts, coooaaaar"

Girl = "...brochure says you can wipe it clean with a lint cloth"
 

Guy = "...Yeah big Levinson's - some huge Magnepans a $30,000 turntable and $16000 worth of cables "
Girl = "...now I know he's mad, I think I'll move back to my Mom's house and find an intellectual boyfriend who reads Jean Paul Satre, eats nothing but lettuce and rides a pushbike or drives a Prius".
 

The research had also pointed out that a Candle lit dinner to music is the best way of getting laid. But most the most indulgent Hi-Fi junkies I have met;  get more moist the more their front room gets kitted out with Hi-fi-exotica.

Quizzically, Hi-Fi wasn't mentioned in the research and yet "Music" was. The paradox in this research explains that women like to play romantic music to their partners to try and get them into bed.

So ladies, a tip to get what you want. Do a role reversal and buy the hi-Fi exotica instead.  so...

Guy = "...hmmmmm, that's nice"
Girl = "...Yeah big Levinson's - some huge Magnepans a $30,000 turntable and $16000 worth of cables....then I can get my brains screwed out". 

jazzfan
jazzfan's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 months 1 week ago
Joined: Sep 8 2005 - 8:55am
Interesting

Very interesting but no mention of sports.

soulful.terrain
soulful.terrain's picture
Offline
Last seen: 5 months 4 days ago
Joined: Nov 22 2010 - 12:15pm
enjoyed the read
D3sign3r wrote:

 

...well, high end Hi-fi, of course...

According to folklore we men think of sex every 15 seconds .....or was it minutes....I'm not sure ...and apparently women think about it only after being heavily sedated or drugged.

A well known British newspaper, The Daily Telegraph, did some research on this claiming that their study showed men think about sex 5000 times a year or 13 times a day, and for women this was 1800 times a year or 5 times a day.  One should never underestimate the power of the male mind - this is proof, if any where needed, that we process more information.

No doubt their study was conducted only on us very proud, reserved British people, because I'm sure if you were Italian or your name happen to be Berlusconi, you may have to use "Pico-seconds" as the time constant.

There was a film called "What women want" with Mel Gibson hearing brainwave patterns from females. The upshot of this was that he had the ability to read the thoughts of any female person close by.

 Imagine this idea the other way round... in that women can clearly hear OUR thoughts...all sorts of guy type musings would get an uncensored airing.

  • "I wish  could bury my face into her jugs and drown".
  • Girl on bike "...boy that saddle's in heaven, wish it was my face"
  • "I wonder what colour her bush is?...I'd like to trim it with my teeth"
  • "I'd like to play new and interesting games with her...like... find the sausage".

    etc. etc...

Of course if this were the case, we blokes will get a devastating  bitch slapping 13 times a day? Or according to the folklore; every 15 seconds or minutes or whatever...

BUT... what if we could telepathically pick up each others thoughts simultaneously; Imagine the arguments that may be induced in a Hi-Fi store

 

Guy = "Yeah , that'll do me, big woofers, it'll sound great"

Girl = "...that was designed in and for Frankenstein's castle"

Guy = "what a pathetic piece of junk"

Girl = "...it'll fit nicely on the bookcase"
 

Guy = "...specs says 0.0003% THD at 1000Watts, coooaaaar"

Girl = "...brochure says you can wipe it clean with a lint cloth"
 

Guy = "...Yeah big Levinson's - some huge Magnepans a $30,000 turntable and $16000 worth of cables "
Girl = "...now I know he's mad, I think I'll move back to my Mom's house and find an intellectual boyfriend who reads Jean Paul Satre, eats nothing but lettuce and rides a pushbike or drives a Prius".
 

The research had also pointed out that a Candle lit dinner to music is the best way of getting laid. But most the most indulgent Hi-Fi junkies I have met;  get more moist the more their front room gets kitted out with Hi-fi-exotica.

Quizzically, Hi-Fi wasn't mentioned in the research and yet "Music" was. The paradox in this research explains that women like to play romantic music to their partners to try and get them into bed.

So ladies, a tip to get what you want. Do a role reversal and buy the hi-Fi exotica instead.  so...

Guy = "...hmmmmm, that's nice"
Girl = "...Yeah big Levinson's - some huge Magnepans a $30,000 turntable and $16000 worth of cables....then I can get my brains screwed out". 

 

I enjoyed the hell out of this. Good post! :-)

  • X
    Enter your Stereophile.com username.
    Enter the password that accompanies your username.
    Loading