Vote

My Love as sung by Paul McCartney and Wings. I know it's blasphemy to attack "Sir Paul" but this song truly bites. On its own it is supremely annoying, and even more so when compared to Paul McCartney's large body of work which is mostly fantastic.

born in the US must be one of the boring, unless you're a Yank, then I suppose it's bril bad song, definitely no cigar boss.

1. "Little Pink Houses" by John Cougar Mellencamp. 2. "Born in the USA" by Bruce Springsteen. 3. Anything by Yes.

No doubts: Sting, he is the king of lah-lah-lah boring phrases in different keys. Bought 2 CDs on wild recommendation by friends, but they really turned out to be a patience test.

I'm not sure I know the name of this beast for certain...I only hear it at the gas station and video store, but that's plenty... They keep repeating "This Kiss" over and over..kiss of death is more like it!

Sunny, by all means. But "Rhapsody in the Rain" transcends badness into the realm of the sublime.

Music Box Dancer by Frank Mills. This piece of efluvium stunk up the airwaves for what seemed like months. As I recall, originally intended as elevator music, but some witless DJ popped the thing on and it became a smash hit. Frank's other credits include "Peter Piper," "The Happy Song" and "Most People Are Nice."

Mmmm...Bop, or however the heck you spell it

Perhaps I don't really like pop songs... But if I have to pick just one, it will obviously have to be a great hit song: "I just called to say I love you" is definitely a candidate; a great artist made a surprisingly unlistenable mess, I can't understand why people seem to like it...

It's gotta be "Feelings!"

MacArthur Park!! What idiot would leave a cake out in the rain... and he should have put the recipe somewhere safe... I have no sympathy for such disorderly conduct... (frankly it *is* amazing that these stupid lyrics stay with me after all this time... or perhaps I just had a "flashback?")

Anything by Britney Spears is assembly line manufactured music "sung" by a manufactured "talent." "The Hampster Dance" is more creative and better performed.

Holly Jolly Christmas by Burl Ives. Also "Let Me" by Paul Revere and the Raiders. And anything by Tommy James and the Shondells.

YOUHR HAVIN' MAH BAY-BEE!

Loving You by Minnie Riperton

I'm sorely tempted to pick just one, but singling out any song as the worst of all time is sort of a fool's errand. "Jennifer Juniper" by Donovan was pretty bad. Then there was Yummy Yummy Yummy I got Love In My Tummy. And who wrote that song, "When He Hits Me (It Feels Like A Kiss)"? (Phil Spector even produced that one! - JI) The 80s hair metal bands all have contenders. Really, I try not to think too much about the worst songs.

The worst pop song? I'd have to say any "ripoff" of MC Hammer. What a loser!

At the top of my list is Bette Midler's "The Rose". This sticky syrupy mess reminds me of the sentimental drivel put out by the government in George Orwell's 1984. With Bette Midler around, the government needn't bother. Also on my Worst list are the teenage death songs of the early sixties. Let's see, there was Honey, "Patches," "Teen Angel," "Running Bear" "Tell Laura I Love Her," "Last Kiss," "Billy and Sue" ... Mad Magazine did a funny feature on them at the time called "The Teen Death Song Game." If I'm shopping somewhere and the store's Muzak kicks out one of those tearjerkers out over the PA I just cringe.

Billy, Don't Be A Hero Seasons in the Sun this new thing by Vitamin C Fly Robin Fly

Anything from "GREASE"

Hello It's Me by Todd Rundgren. Actually, almost everything he ever did would qualify as the "worst pop song."

Rock Lobster By the B-52's. I can't stand this band on any song I've heard.

and the winner is... "Love Will Keep Us Together."

Muskrat Love

Anything done by Whitney "yellin'" Houstin.

How about . . . anything by Yoko Ono. Maybe that Melanie song about roller skates.

The all-time winner absolutely, positively has to be "Afternoon Delight" by that famous one-hit wonder, the Starland Vocal Band (thank heavens they were a one-hit wonder). Perhaps the ultimate indignity is that this amazing example of songwriting prowess made the charts as number one for two weeks. Whoever said that no one ever went broke underestimating the poor tastes of the American public was right.

They're Coming to Take Me Away. Ha Ha. Followed closely by any song by the 1910 Fruitgum Company.

Sugar,Sugar by the Archies and "Knock Three Times" by Tony Orlando. Surely these recordings merit a place in Hell for the people involved in the recordings.

I COULD NAME HUNDREDS that were totally intolerable, if I hadn't worked so hard to forget their names.