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I can barely manage it myself it's so complex!
Reader Louis McFarlane asks a question that may touch a nerve or two among audiophiles.
I let my wife, but only after she went through extended training. Seriously. I don't really care when she listens to CDs, which, when she does listen to music, is what she will listen to 99% of the time. When it comes to my cherished records, I have finally let her touch them, but if I am at home, I ask that I handle them.
Back when I was in the service living in a communal barracks, I had my system set up in the common area and made the mistake of letting others use it. Despite the fact that everyone there was a techie, and despite the fact everyone tried to show respect for the property of others, within a few months all the speaker drivers were totally blown. I withdrew my system, bought new speakers (no one else bothered to help cover the costs), and vowed that NEVER AGAIN would anyone touch ANY stereo gear of mine without a long period of training and supervision. After several years and many lessons, my wife is now qualified to play CDs and adjust the volume in my absence.
My wife has no problems with using the stereo with the VCR or CD player as a source. She will not touch the turntable. Too much fussing with stylus and record cleaning machines, and she doesn't know what's in the album library. That's fine with me. Another match made in heaven.
It was bad enough when I tried to convince my wife to look at the equipment, speakers, and cables parked in our family room as pieces of art. Do you really think I'd then have the balls to say, "By the way, Dear, keep your hands OFF it"?
In abstract, I'm willing to let anyone (excluding multiple children at once) use my system---once I've explained it to them. But since I'm the only audiophile I know, I find that everyone is afraid to touch my expensive stuff---no takers yet.
Mom taught me to share my toys. At worst, it can all be fixed or replaced. People who don't let others play with their systems share the same moron mentality as people who buy expensive cars for the privilege of parking at the far end of parking lots. The more expensive the car, the farther they walk. It doesn't compute.
We let anyone use our system. "We" is my wife and me, and we don't have children and seldom have children in our house. (Child-like grown people are another story.) Many guests find the components intimidating, so they tend to shy away. I like it when others pick music from our collection. It can give you a fresh perspective on things when folks pull something out that you haven't played for a while. Allowing others to "man" the controls encourages folks to take the music in another direction. Having said all that, drunks and turntables don't mix too well (present company included).
Anyone showing an interest in listening to music is most welcomed to use the system. Moreover, I realized that preventing people from using it make them skeptical on the sound quality of this multi-thousands system. People free to use it have a more curious, if not sympathetic, attitude.
Only my wife is allowed to touch/use my audio system. My two relatively younger kids (2 and 5 years old) are not allowed to touch my system, and fortunately they are well-trained in that aspect. My audio system resides in the main living room. With limited space/rooms, the thought of a dedicated listening/music room is just a dream . . . until we start building our new home early next year. Until then, my floorstanding speakers especially are quite "vulnerable" with my two younger kids running around the house. Fingers crossed . . . Fortunately (or unfortunately!), I do have valved gear . . . may be too hazardous with my kids. By the way, keeping my CD collection in pristine condition is also important to me. My wife appreciates my "fussiness" in this area and handles my CDs carefully. Thankfully, my kids respect my CDs and stay clear of them.
My six-year-old may be the youngest audiophile ever. He has full knowledge and rein of my Polk SDA I, Adcom power and pre, and Marantz CD. He does a phenomenal job of handling my LPs and CDs. He has quite the nimble fingers. He enjoys Stones, Who, Hendrix, Classical, Zappa, Carlos.